A Letter to my Younger Self
One thing I have learned in my 43 years of life is that we don’t leave this world unscathed. If you want to truly live, the results are the dents and scratches you collect. They are reminders of the wonderful and the heartbreaking, of the difficult lessons and the magical connections—badges of honor your will proudly display. I think of the dents and scars I have collected, and I see a woman who risked everything in order to fully live. If I had the opportunity to whisper in the ear of my younger self, the young girl on the brink of womanhood who was so scared to make her mark on the world, this is what I would tell her:
Listen here sweet girl, Life is a wild and beautiful ride. You will know pain, love, loss, joy, but most of all, and most importantly, you will learn to know You. Being human is an arduous journey, but I promise that every challenge you face, you will rise from, my love, and you will rise above.
You will find real love young. He will sweep you off your feet and you will embrace and fall deeper with each passing moment, even long after you say “I do”. You and your partner will have a soulful connection that will grow and strengthen through success and loss–By age 30 you will have your second miscarriage that will bring you to your knees. You’ll fear that the universe– that God, even Mother Nature, Herself, are joined together trying to tell you that you shouldn’t become a mommy. Do not lose hope, because after 6 long years of trying you will prove the universe wrong–and after two days of labor, you and your husband will finally hold your precious little baby girl. You will immediately feel the rush of love and protectiveness you never knew was possible while cradling her in your arms. Oh sweetie, you will find peace in your body that no lover can ever give you. This child will not only fill your heart but will shift other relationships in your life–your mother who was once only known as dominating task-master will morph overnight to a wise elder and loving friend who whispers, “You got this, you are strong.”
And oh! How your body changes over your life! Your once perky assets that you didn’t care for as a teen, will drop the moment you stop breast feeding your 8 month old daughter. And oh, how you will miss them, You will discover new cracks and valleys on your face almost weekly after age 35, the map of motherhood seemingly drawn on your face. Your belly and thighs will be determined to grow wider and softer with each passing decade, the mark of happiness and exhaustion .
My Love…..one day you will go from a wife to a widow. A noun you never expected to be called. You will come to know the power and joy that Love brings, only to have it ripped from you without warning. But, do not fret, your story does not end there. There is great sweetness you will still discover. Such as the power of your woman tribe, calling you forth to bravely step into your wild feminine power, and pick you up in your darkest of days and remind you of your inner most hidden strengths.
You will also learn to accept the death of your love, and by sheer grit, rebuild so that one day you will look up from your Life seeing it from a place of gratitude. It will not be easy, you will fall and you will fall hard over and over again. But, oh how you will you rise again. You will be stronger, wiser, and in this magical way softer. Because, my sweet baby girl, you learned somewhere on your life’s journey that you like the soft part of you and no matter the pain or the loss, you will hold on to the woman who sees the best in others and fought to keep an open heart. Oh love, the best part is you will one day look in the mirror with pride and wonder at how this confident and brave woman stands in front of you. Your life will be a reflection of the thousands of women who came before and a foreshadowing of thousands who have yet to be. And that is a life worth living, a legacy worth leaving.
Written by Erin Prewitt, Intuitive Life Coach
To follow Erin on Instagram you can find her at @therealerinprewitt
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